Mauled in Cyberspace and Elsewhere

Firstly.  To our alert apparently Moscow-adjacent reader.  No, I do not sell envelopes.  Indeed, since these dismal economic times have been upon us, I make my own, for personal use only.   If envelope has another meaning then perhaps…?  Thank you for reading, anyway.

Today started with The Partner announcing, first thing, that we are “dinosaurs”.  Neither one of us has a Blackberry.  Uh oh, I thought.  I brightened temporarily, wondering if, if I were a dinosaur, would I get to be one of the ones with the spiked tails?  Prudence prevailed and I did not actually ask that question.  So, I went back to  pondering where all this stuff comes from, these envelope sales queries, along with where the money went, and a few other things provoked by random social encounters.  Take today.   The checker at the grocery store looked at me, looked at the several things in glass jars I’d purchased, and said, well you won’t be wanting a bag will you? I sighed deeply and said, YES IWANTAFREAKINGBAG. Thankyouverymuch.  Anyway,  I’ve decided it’s all emanating from, and hidden in,  the Kuyper Belt.  Really.  The Kuyper Belt of ****, if you will.  That’s where it all is.  Circling Neptune.   Chilly willy.  I’ve heard from reliable sources there are no envelopes there, either.

2 responses to this post.

  1. Eh? I don’t have a blackberry either. 😦
    Don’t have an iPhone or even an iPod actually and I still manage to get work done (but not right now, obviously).

    I stick to plain ol’ paper pad and pen since they’re dead-battery and butt proof.

    Honestly, whatever happened to just “silence”? Did someone pin it next to platform shoes, sideburns, bellbottoms and VW Beetles?

    And if I were a dinosaurs, I’d want to be this fella. It has a sideways mohawk and devil horns! How awesome is that?

    Next time someone brings up that I don’t have a blackberry, I’d say:

    Well do you have a sideways mohawk?
    How about 3 foot long devil horns?
    Well, I’m still more awesome than you and your blackberry!

    …And then I’ll just walk away.


    • This IS comforting, E: You Have No Idea. And, if I didn’t have devil horns? I’d give you a hug. I mean, I thought WE were the only ones in the “developed world” not having Ipods and !phones and all the rest of it. ( And not caring, in fact. I won’t go into the rest of the luddite-ism around here for fear of…well. Let’s just say we actually cook our own food.) As to silence? Never, around here. Never, ever. Amazing. Well, seize the day, etc., with earmuffs.


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