One Day At A Time

Quite often, it is portions thereof, also.  Some days it gets down to ten minute increments.  Today is trying to be one of those days and I am stoutly not letting it.  It’s windy (35 mph) and my Rube Goldberg Internet (HUGHES NETWORK I’M TALKING TO YOU) is doing fun things like having the cursor move to the front of whatever line you’re typing, just out of the blue, or else getting lost completely- right after a whole lot of information has been entered.  Anyway it is, like many things here, good training in dealing with frustration.

Meanwhile it has been drama and excitement filled up here on the hill.  Unfortunately even changing the names won’t be enough, but let’s just say there were dramatic solo-car-let’s-roll-the-Volvo-and-total-its  (on the one straight part of the gravel road here, go figure)- and run-into’s of old lady cars in intersections at the store that starts with W and where we never go.  The run-into episode produced a driveable car, but sadly someone forgot to tie the hood down after it got crunched up and the next day it flew up into the windshield and that, Gentle Reader, was that.  So, net net two cars down.  There are way too many cars up here anyway, my opinion.  Fortunately, no one got injured which is quite amazing but there it is.  The car flip story led to, apparently, a veritable fire storm of impaired verbiage between the households involved and now everyone on the hill is in an uproar over changes in plans and whatnot. I was amused to hear that Car Flip was concerned about which rumor people were believing about the whole thing: one was there being a certain degree of Toasted On Board!  involved, the other that a leg was severed.  I am not answering the telephone anymore for a while, essentially.   We saw the car parts down on the road yesterday and that was enough.

Anyway, to counter all that, yesterday we were privileged to see the two falcons who live by us circle gracefully above the yurt, as if to show us their splendor.  The sun through the ring patterns on their tails was astounding.  Later on, there was a huge blue heron.  And this morning? A bald eagle.   The new crop of baby lizards is out running around, the frogs are talking, and the baby goats down the road are wobbling around their pasture.  For a few days they were sleeping on the green grass, looking like two velvet cream and maple colored packages with their legs and heads all tucked in, while mom grazed nearby.   There are millions of bees here too, and the bee keepers are out with their interesting trucks and lifts and veiled hats.  Our rosemary is beginning to bloom, with those incredible sky colored flowers, and buttercups are coming up.

It’s an interesting endeavor then, swinging between the looming black holes all round (our neighbors!, Iran! Rush Limbaugh!- about whom Harry Shearer totally rocked this weekend on Le Show), and the sense that progress is possible and everything is, in fact,  going to be not just fine, but perhaps really, really good.  Welcome to your multiple personality adulthood, perhaps.  In THE WEB THAT HAS NO WEAVER, I saw that the author, Ted Kaptchuk, has written a useful description of the differences between Western and Eastern medicines- specific analysis of a specific thing or symptom, versus understanding of the whole system, what may have brought the symptom into being as part of a larger entity, respectively.   The challenge of the current time, perhaps, is to merge those approaches.  I guess that would be like unifying the right and left brain?  But what the heck, it’s all in one place.  “Such a small space and so much mysteriousness” as the Dalai Lama said.  A daunting task too, perhaps, because even Kaptchuk with his powerful understanding of Chinese Medicine, sounded pretty ego/analysis oriented in a recent story on Placebo Medicine in the New Yorker.   In one spot, for example, he essentially said that what he did with his patients worked because he was a good healer and not because of the techniques and protocols involved.  This, to me, is a very western viewpoint- that you are doing this thing yourself, you are responsible for the results based on your thought process, and of course, what a good boy are you for this accomplishment.  My teacher told us at the beginning of one course of study that we couldn’t KNOW this material but we could BE it, and it would take a lifetime. I’m OK with that approach.  Every day then really brings something fresh, a revelation, and not just another knot to wrestle with til quitting time or it gives up.

This is kind of the crux of the whole thing, of course.  How to let go and merge with our world and do what we are here to do, every day, and be able to do it and let it go.  To not attach importance to ourselves because we have done x or y.  To do, as Lao Tzu wrote, our work and then let it go.  To achieve the paradoxical state of more intense living and being the more we shift out of the drives of the ego, and into the bigger picture.  Although it seems you’ll completely lose yourself, the reverse is really the case.  The same thing goes in terms of external events.  We cannot shut ourselves off and ignore everything, pretend to be something we aren’t or that things are some way THEY aren’t, but we also cannot let the energy and speed of an event suck us into a vortex where we lose both our momentum and our way.  There are so many hooks in all the drama it’s easy to lose sight of what you’re looking at.  What showed itself today was that the less one attends to the hooks and the more the attention is on the shape of the narrative in its entirety, the better off one will be.  Sometimes I wonder if I will ever pass this class!




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