chihuahuas. again.

Or, focus on dependent arising phemonena.  Life is taking yet another turn- one which we’re experiencing on two out of four wheels, dangerously close to the edge of the cliff. This appears to be the only way we make these turns.

It’s all well and good and one thing to read about how to cope with things, practice shifting focus and all that, when you’re not out in the field so to speak.   But when you ARE out in the field and just like that, Massive and Monstrous Stuff Arises That Must Be Dealt With, and it’s stuff that you think you simply cannot do?  What’s next?  Lots of breathing.   I realized this week that really is almost the most important thing, besides being necessary.  The body is an energy system, breathing in and out, and energy coming up the back and down the front.  Ascending and descending.  The pathways through the body of all this are designated with particular organ pairs, in much of traditional Asian medicine.  Each pair of organs so designated also has one that ascends and one that descends.

The particular pair I’m thinking of are Stomach and Spleen.  Spleen is kind of like the pilot light for your body.  Stomach is how things get processed, digested, analyzed, used and discarded.  Spleen ascends, stomach descends.  So when, for example, that panicky feeling starts? Or suddenly something large appears in your throat?  It can mean that the energies are reversed- the spleen heads down and the stomach heads up.  In physical terms, this can produce diarrhea and nausea, respectively. Undesirable, to say the least.  These two energies manifest quite often in stress related issues, and I only recently just found during an especially intense few days that, through breathing, I could actually stop the progress in the wrong direction and get it going the right way again.  This works all the time if one does it, and has a corollary above and beyond avoidance of “ill-ness.”

The corollary is that once you get the energy in your body going the right way again, you’re breathing properly, and whatever it is that’s hit you like a bullet?  It seems clearer.  You can actually take another step and another and another.  Then comes the part where you gotta have faith, faith that if you can just get out of your own way, the larger way opens up- in fact it’s waiting for you, always.  You have to have faith that the pain you feel will pass and new things will be revealed and most often, whaddaya know, things are better when the dust settles.   It requires trust, and that is a hard thing I think because….who can you trust? What can you trust?  What the heck is trust anyway?

For me it boils down to this.  Trust, faith, all those things, come up in a person once the focus on me-me-me and the ego’s reality are moved to their proper position at the end of the line.  There is a bigger picture, we’re all part of it, and on some level that bigger picture has a mind of its own, a trajectory that, if you move with it, can carry you way farther than clinging to your “thinking” and habitual patterns.  Even when a person thinks they’ve got things understood to a certain extent, and may think they know how they’re going to respond to things, there’s always another lesson that exposes just that particular part of the equation that hasn’t been mastered.  At this point I’m tackling what seems like a PhD thesis I forgot I had to write.  Maybe the particulars don’t matter, but what does matter is how this particular wildfire in my own life causes growth even while it destroys things.  More later with helpful tips and tool suggestions.

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